For over 25 years, Home Alone has been a must-watch movie for the holidays. The escapades of Macaulay Culkin’s Kevin as a kid trying to navigate his life without adult supervision over Christmas, while also protecting himself and his family home from thieves, are entertaining from beginning to end. Part of what makes these moments so worth watching, of course, are all the memorable quotes.
As a comedy, Home Alone has some of the funniest lines in any Christmas movie and continues to impact viewers, beyond the millennials it was originally intended for.
10
“Bless This Highly Nutritious Microwavable Macaroni and Cheese Dinner and the People Who Sold It On Sale. Amen.”
Kevin
At the beginning of Home Alone, there’s a scene where Kevin finds himself livid when his entire family sits down to eat pizza, and he discovers there’s no longer a slice of cheese pizza just for him. It doesn’t help matters when Kevin’s older brother Buzz (Devin Ratray) taunts him about it.
So, when Kevin’s family accidentally leaves him behind, he finally has a moment to enjoy a meal of his choosing in some peace and quiet. After lighting some candles to set the relaxing mood, Kevin sits down to eat and prays aloud, “Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it in sale. Amen.” Ironically, though, he doesn’t get to eat his meal as the clock chimes, signaling he needs to prepare to defend his home against Harry (Joe Pesci) and Marv (Daniel Stern).
9
“You Can Be a Little Old for a Lot of Things. You’re Never Too Old to Be Afraid.”
Marley
Marley (Robert Blossom) originally gets a bad wrap as a serial killer who lives in the same neighborhood as the McCallisters. He even frightens Kevin when the young child is in the store trying to purchase a toothbrush. However, there comes a touching scene in a church when Marley and Kevin actually get a chance to talk. The older gent quickly debunks the serial killer rumors about himself and explains he had a falling out with his son.
Kevin shows remarkable maturity and advises Marley to make amends with his son. Marley explains his fear of making such a move, and Kevin can’t believe Marley is afraid of something at his age. That’s when Marley states, “You can be a little old for a lot of things. You’re never too old to be afraid.” The line isn’t laced with comedy; it’s rather touching.
8
“If It Makes You Feel Any Better, I Forgot My Reading Glasses.”
Uncle Frank
Uncle Frank (Gerry Bamman) doesn’t exactly have a fan in Kevin, or many in the Home Alone audience. Besides Harry and Marv, he’s arguably the other adult antagonist in Kevin’s world, and he’s family. With that being said, it should come as no surprise that Uncle Frank isn’t that compassionate when Kate (Catherine O’Hara) and Peter McCallister (John Heard) realize Kevin is not on the plane. In fact, Uncle Frank consoles the duo with the not-so-comforting words, “If it makes you feel any better, I forgot my reading glasses.”
It should go without saying that missing glasses are in no way comparable to a missing child. Kate and Peter weren’t pleased to hear Frank’s insensitive remarks.
7
“Ma’am, I’m Eight Years Old. You Think I Would Be Here Alone? I Don’t Think So.”
Kevin
Once it sinks in that he’s been left alone, a young Kevin McCallister does the very adult thing and goes to the grocery store to pick up a few items. To his credit, he doesn’t do what most kids would do and spend money on bulk candy, cake, and ice cream. Instead, he picks up home essentials like bread, milk, and orange juice. However, despite his display of mature consumer choices, when he gets to the register, the cashier questions if he’s alone in the store buying the groceries.
In reply, Kevin states, “Ma’am, I’m eight years old. You think I would be here alone? I don’t think so.” From a viewer’s perspective, considering Kevin wasn’t trying to purchase booze, it would seem the cashier was a bit intrusive.
6
“This House Is So Full of People, It Makes Me Sick! When I Grow Up and Get Married, I’m Living Alone!”
Kevin
Revisiting the whole “Pizza Gate” incident, after Buzz finishes taunting Kevin about there being no cheese pizza left, Kevin lunges at Buzz, and milk starts flying as family chaos ensues. Kate eventually interrupts, breaks up the fight, and shifts the blame entirely to Kevin. He’s sent upstairs alone as a punishment.
While still stewing from being treated unfairly by his family, he yells out, “This house is so full of people, it makes me sick! When I grow up and get married, I’m living alone!” Considering the mistreatment Kevin received from his relatives up to his point, who could blame him for feeling this way?
5
“We Slept In!”
Kate and Peter
When the Airport Express shuttle arrives at the McCallister home, the entire family is fast asleep. A powerful storm caused a power outage in the neighborhood the night before, therefore disrupting all the home’s electrically powered alarm clocks. As the shuttle drivers knock and ring the doorbell, Kate eventually wakes up and looks at her watch on the nightstand to check the time. She immediately then yells, “Peter.”
After a brief pause, the married couple simultaneously blurt out, “We slept in!” This causes a widespread panic in the house, with everyone, aside from Kevin, rushing to get ready for the airport and catch their flight. Out of all the quotes on this list, this one is perhaps the most relatable. Who hasn’t overslept and been in a mad dash not to be late somewhere?
4
“I Don’t Want to See You Again for the Rest of My Whole Life. And I Don’t Want to See Anybody Else Either.”
Kevin
As Kevin is being reprimanded by his mother for his “bad” behavior, he’s very defiant. It’s arguably his attitude that leads his mother to up the ante on his punishment and send him to the attic to spend the rest of the evening post-“Pizza Gate.” After it sinks in that he has to sleep alone upstairs, he lashes out by saying, “I don’t want to see you again for the rest of my whole life. And I don’t want to see anybody else either.”
Kate eventually replies, “You’d feel pretty sad if you woke up tomorrow morning and you didn’t have a family.” Kevin remains unfazed in his frustration and counters, “No, I wouldn’t.” And who could blame him?
3
“I’m Gonna Give You To The Count Of 10 To Get Your Ugly, Yellow, No-Good Keister Off My Property Before I Pump Your Guts Full Of Lead!”
Actor From ‘Angels With Filthy Souls’
When Kevin starts rolling out his defense against Marv and Harry, one of the first things he does is try to keep them from entering the home at all. Kevin plays the black-and-white movie Angels with Filthy Souls and turns up the volume so Marv can hear it from the outside. That’s when movie fans hear the infamous line, “I’m gonna give you to the count of 10 to get your ugly, yellow, no-good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead.”
What makes the line even more comical is the fact that Kevin then sets off firework poppers in a pot to make it appear that gunshots are ringing out. Marv goes running in fear. Oh, and a fun fact, Angels with Filthy Souls is actually just a fictional movie created for Home Alone.
2
“Kevin!”
Kate
The iconic “Kevin” was shouted from the metaphorical rooftop in both Home Alone and Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. However, zeroing in on the first movie, after most of the McCallister family are seated on the plane, it finally hits Kate that someone very important is missing. Sitting on the plane, she bellows out, “Kevin.”
Now is a good time to point out that, looking back at Kate and Peter, one has to question their parenting. Yes, the family was running late for their flight, and there were a lot of them to keep up with. But for Kate and Peter to forget about Kevin at home, only to remember him right before takeoff, is a bit unacceptable.
1
“Keep the Change, Ya Filthy Animal.”
Kevin
Capping the previously mentioned scene with the firework poppers, Kevin gets quite the laugh tricking Marv and sending him running. As the clip from Angels With Filthy Souls wraps, Kevin says in step with the actor from the fictional film, “Keep the change, ya filthy animal.”
The brief quote is embedded in the hallowed halls of Hollywood. The phrase is easily identifiable among millennials, and one that could arguably rank among the great Christmas movie quotes like A Christmas Story‘s, “Fra-gee-lay! It must be Italian,” and National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation‘s iconic back and forth between Clark (Chevy Chase) and Aunt Bethany (Mae Questel).
Home Alone
- Release Date
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November 16, 1990
- Runtime
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103 minutes
- Director
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Chris Columbus