Jimmy Kimmel opened Monday’s (January 20) episode of Jimmy Kimmel Dwell! by sharing his response to Donald Trump‘s inauguration, describing it because the occasion the place “our lengthy nationwide nightmare was formally sworn in.”
“It was a really bizarre day in our nation’s historical past right this moment,” the late-night host started. “A day that was unimaginable 4 years in the past and it’s nonetheless fairly exhausting to wrap your head round. THE GUY… ah, nevermind.”
Kimmel mentioned he awoke Monday morning to seek out his son had peed within the mattress and his canine had pooped on the ground outdoors his bed room. “And that was simply an appetizer for the remainder of the day,” he quipped.
The comic then referenced how President Trump celebrated the historic day by promoting inauguration day Bibles and launching a brand new meme coin “to the tune of, some say, $41 billion.”
“He launched his personal cryptocurrency days earlier than he grew to become president; I hope all of us perceive how loopy that’s,” Kimmel continued. “The president of the US following within the footsteps of the Hawk Tuah lady.”
Kimmel turned his consideration to the ceremony itself, noting that because of the freezing temperatures in Washington, “they needed to transfer the festivities indoors, which was truly higher for Trump, tougher for Melania to flee.”
He then touched on the custom the place the outgoing President and First Woman have tea with the incoming President and First Woman, “apart from 4 years in the past when Trump refused to do it.” Watching the footage of the assembly, Kimmel described Melania’s look as “goth Al Capone.”
“General, not like the final time, there was plenty of respect paid to custom,” he added. “Kamala Harris invited JD Vance to the Vice President’s residence on the Naval Observatory for a ceremonial humping of the Millard Filmore futon.”
Kimmel then centered on President Trump’s speech, noting, “It was not an uplifting, and even well-written speech. Trump mentioned ‘the Golden Age of America begins proper now’ twice… he bragged a few landslide victory that was on no account a landslide victory.”
“Lots of people had been questioning why all these wealthy guys had been invited to take a seat within the Capitol for the inauguration, and there’s a superbly good clarification for it,” he continued. “Trump is promoting the nation to the very best bidder.”
He added, “It actually has been wonderful to observe these highly effective males, who don’t must ever make one other greenback of their lives, debasing themselves to suck as much as this ridiculous individual. However that’s why they’re billionaires, I suppose.”
After all, Kimmel couldn’t resist speaking in regards to the awkward almost-kiss between Trump and Melania. “Donald and Melania are very very a lot in love,” he mentioned. “You possibly can see right here they’d a really candy second, they shared an nearly a kiss. I suppose she didn’t wish to mess up his make-up.”
You possibly can watch Kimmel’s full opening monologue within the video above.
Jimmy Kimmel Dwell!, Weeknights, 11:35pm ET/PT, ABC